Thursday, 31 December 2009

Do I smell of sick? Ahhh get me another vodka...

Oh my god... 2009 is almost over. My list of memorable moments is a rather motley assortment:

Son number 2 had his first birthday and is walking
Son number 1 has become cheeky and leaned to tell lies to his advantage (it was daddy who didn't flush the toilet)
I've lost a whole stone of baby weight - and am still eating a twix on a regular basis
I've had more sleep in the last six months
We've successfully been on holiday to an exotic faraway place with two under 5's!!
I've become an established baker (cake, shortbread, biscuits whipped up in the blink of an eye - little helper included)
My husband has accepted his role and is now doing his fair share of early mornings and bathtimes! YES!
I have managed to get a part time job I am happy in

GOD what more could I want!

We went to a wedding reception last night. It was the first night out for hubby and me since our holiday and I got in from work with time to spare and no need to rush the makeup. Anyway, finally beautified I went down, minus boots and breakable jewellrey, to do bathtime while husband got ready. All done with minimal fuss - timing was running with military precision. Yeah you know its about to come crashing down! My lovely friend babysitting all ready to be on high alert for the evening when.....

Mr T starts coughing.... Drama King is whinging about having another story (because he knows we are going out) and then Mr T starts really coughing. I run up the stairs (as we have a townhouse so two lots of stairs) lift him out of the cot and he CHUCKS HIS GUTS UP all over my party dress and sparkly bolero cardi!!!

JESAS CHRIST!! And a small voice says 'mummy we don't say jesus christ'. DK get back in bed!!!Husband running around in boxers getting DK back into bed and throwing towels at me. Lovely friend comes up to help - catches site of husband half naked and retreats quickly with a 'let me know if I can do anything to help' (he's actually quite attractive for a 40+ man) and I'm texting my lift to the wedding whilst carrying sick covered child to ask if we've got an extra 15mins before pick up time!

We got there eventually, two kids in bed left in the lovely capable hands of my friend.
Doused in perfume, an entierely new outfit minus sparkly bolero, we got to the bar... a large vodka and coke please.  Phew!
Wishing you all a very happy new year!!

Wednesday, 2 December 2009

I've neglected my blog because I've had the good fortune to go on holiday for two weeks. And boy what a holiday... Goa in the south of India - beautiful!

Anyway, I read that 'Is there a plan B' had written a great blog about alienating an entire boeing 747 well you could see from the looks of the people around us that they were GUTTED to be sitting near the only kids on the entire plane!!! Mr T didn't help this by attempting to grab the already thinning head of hair of the bloke in front as we squeezed into our seats. I suppose there are not many people who would drag their kids 11 hours away just for a bit of sun but ultimately we were going with my parents who contriubuted to the cost so we could afford to come with them, and I was going to see my gran - maybe for the last time.

All of this didn't help me when Drama King had watched Madagascar for the 3rd time and run the battery down on the portable dvd player, had an 'accident',  annoyed the man in front ('will you tell your son to stop kicking my seat'), eaten half a packet of biscuits (to buy his silence) and (obviously) became hyperactive and attempted to wrestle with Mr T - who screamed. All in the first hour or so. My best advice is if you are going longhaul - get a night flight. On the way there, the two of them were kept without proper daytime naps and so slept for 80% of the journey - thank god - although this meant I was unable to go to the loo or eat for 8 hours as Mr T was spread eagled across me asleep.

DK has grown in confidence and curiosity since the holiday. This was a conversation with a dodgy fruit seller on the beach:

Hawker on beach: You like to buy some bananas/pineapples/melon (in strong indian accent)
Me: No thank you
DK: Yes I like pineapple
Hawker: Yes you like pineapple?
Me: No thank you (more firmly)
DK: Yes I do like pineapple
Hawker: You want some pineapple or mango (lowering big heavy basket of his head ready to make the sale)
Me: DK be QUIET PLEASE, NO thanks we don't need any fruit
DK: Oh I like mangoes
Hawker: Yes mango? 20 ruppees
Me: AGgggrrhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
Hawker: Running away with big basket under his arm tripping over the sand
DK: Mummy whats a mango?

So now I'm back to reality with my mocha tan fading under my longjohns, I'm getting on to the next subject... please not more toys for xmas....